In our last mindfulness challenge, we discussed the importance of self-love, and the eight components need to love yourself greatly. This week we are going deep into the first step, awareness.
Before we do, I wanted to take a moment to thank those who have been patient with me this past month. Our last mindfulness challenge was the last week in April, and this challenge was the one I was working on when a tornado hit my home on May 4th. We finally have a temporary home for now, electric and wifi. Hopefully, I will be able to get back to getting mindfulness challenges regularly. So let’s get started on loving ourselves and begin to become aware of who we are.
What is self-awareness?
Self-awareness is about being conscious of your thoughts, emotions, and actions and making sure those align with your core values. Highly self-aware people learn to objectively evaluate themselves in any situation and manage their emotions more clearly.
Before you can love yourself fully, you must understand yourself. The only way to understand yourself is to notice the triggers that affect your emotions.
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. – Carl Jung
This week’s mindfulness challenge is to get deep with your awareness.
I have created a printout for you to use here. Additionally, you can use your journal or clean sheet of paper.
Make three columns on your paper.
In the first column at the top of your sheet, write the words: “When I am.” In the second column, you will write “Makes Me Feel,” and the third column write “So then I.”
Going forward, this will be your log. Keep it close by, and each time you feel any emotion think about why you think the way you do. Record any emotion you are feeling, positive, or negative.
The second column represents your emotions. As you notice yourself having a feeling to something, write that emotion down in the second column.
Now, think about what happened directly before that feeling. You will write that down in the first column.
What about after you had this emotion. How did you react to that emotion? Record that in the third column.
Now you have identified your emotional triggers. You can use these to investigate further and find If they are in line with your core values.
Here are a few examples of my own that I used to practice self-awareness:
When I am: Judged
Makes Me feel: Disliked
So, then I: Distance myself from that person.
The last time I found someone who was talking poorly about me and judging me, my response was to distance myself from this person. My core values tell me not to judge others. From an early age, I was ingrained that I am to treat others the way they treat me. Therefore, if they judge me, how is it possible, they like me? If they do not like me, why would I give a person that does not like me my time? I wouldn’t, nor would I expect someone to give me their time if I were doing the same to them.
Now anytime I feel judged, I know why I choose to distance myself.
The same is true for positive emotion. Here is another example that is how I feel the opposite of my previous emotion.
When I am: Supported
Makes Me feel: Loved
So, then I: Grow closer to someone
After taking the five love languages, I found that my love language is Words of Affirmation. What someone says about me is how I base my relationship with them. When someone gets me and stands up for me, then I want to be closer to them. Keeping in line with my core values, I believe what is inside each of us is what we send out to others. Therefore, I want to surround myself with people that are supportive, positive, and always have my back.
After learning each one of my triggers, I understand why I act the way I do in certain situations.
Now do the same for yourself. Keep your record of self-awareness with you. Each time (good or bad), you feel a certain way, write down what was happening before and how you acted after. Practicing this method will help you understand your feelings. It will help you get to the core of what is triggering your emotions and actions.
You may even find that you act in ways that do not align with your core values. That is perfectly normal. When you notice these triggers, you can then choose if that is something you want to grow and change about yourself. Everyone has something they could work on and be better at, but you get to choose what that is.
If you want to love yourself, you need to understand yourself. So, practice self-awareness often.
The final mystery is oneself. – Oscar Wilde
In previous mindfulness challenges, we have also covered ways to become self-aware of your emotions. If you would like further activities on self-awareness, check out these articles:
Mindfulness Challenge, Focus on Your Locus
Mindfulness Challenge, Wipe Out the ANTS
Another great article to check out that includes self-awareness ideas is:
20 Habits of Mindful and Mature People
Peace & Love,
Ela
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