The art of compassion lies in listening to other stories, without the intent to respond.
As an adult, my dad was always the one who listened to me. I could have a conversation with him where I felt he was listening and not waiting for me to finish so he could respond. He seemed genuinely interested in what I was doing, and I never felt he was judging me. Since he passed away, I have missed those talks.
Months ago, I was having a conversation with another family member. They asked me how my job was going. I was in the first sentence of telling them when I realized they were not listening to me. In the middle of my sentence, I stopped. I said a few words that had no relevance to anything except I was testing to see if they were still listening. They weren’t. I didn’t even bother to finish and guess what? They did not even notice and turned their attention to something else.
They are not alone. Many of us do not listen.
If you pay close attention, you’ll notice that other people are not listening to you. They are waiting for their chance to respond. We are so caught up in our own thoughts, that we forget to live in the moment.
My family doesn’t even realize, but for the last six months, they’ve been my guinea pigs for my own practice of mindful listening. It’s so enjoyable once you train your brain to do this. You feel more like you are living in the moment. You gain compassion for others. The best part for me is learning. You find out things you never knew when you start listening.
Training your brain to be a more mindful listener will take practice. So, let’s get started.
Your mindfulness challenge for the next week is to listen.
The first step in becoming an empathetic listener is to be aware. Next time you are speaking to anyone pay attention to their words and listen. Don’t try to think of how to respond.
When they are done ask them questions to find out more about their life. People love to talk about themselves.
If you listen, you can learn something from everyone.
If you are having trouble with this try “active listening”. Active listening is where you repeat back to the person that is speaking what they said, so you understand the words they are saying.
If you mess up, that’s ok! It means you noticed it and you are in the process of developing your self-awareness. That is a great start to becoming more mindful. Keep at it.
If you are interested in learning about mindfulness and what it can do for you check out: Mindfulness, what is it?
If you have not already signed up for our weekly mindfulness challenge but would like to, please do so here. I would love you to be a part of this mindful tribe!
Love & Peace, Ela
Leave a Reply
Your email is safe with us.