Systemic lupus erythematosus, also commonly known as Lupus, was my diagnosis at the age of twenty-seven. I was four months pregnant with my second child. In the sixth month of my pregnancy, I was found unconscious and taken to the hospital. I would be diagnosed with Eclampsia and would spend the next four weeks there before my daughter was born seven weeks early.
That wasn’t the first time I had learned of Lupus and what having this disease meant. My grandmother suffered from Lupus for most of her life. She was diagnosed with the disease when she was almost sixty. Two years later, she would pass away at the age of sixty-two from complications of this chronic illness. Then, my aunt would be diagnosed and pass away at the age of fifty-six.
I was sick most of my early thirties. I look back at pictures of myself from then and can see that I didn’t feel well.
During this time, I was a single mom with two little kids living on a farm. I spent three hours a day driving to my job as a Senior Analyst for an electric company. We also raised animals for extra money, and I would make soap and lotions to sell. My eldest’s father rarely if ever paid child support and my youngest child’s father paid, but I never knew when that would be, and it could take months. I could never rely on either of them. I was sick most of the time, and I couldn’t tell anyone out of fear they would use my sickness as an excuse to take my kids.
I’m not stating these things for sympathy. I chose to work and live where I did so my kids could have a stable home in the country. This was just what was going on in my life at the time, and I have no regrets. Even though we had struggles and I felt the worse I ever have, it was honestly one of the best times of my life. I loved being a mom and made so many happy memories with my children.
What turned things around for me was when I turned thirty-five. I was done with excuses from the doctors. Done with their same old conclusions that there was nothing else they could do but give me pain medicine and anti-inflammatories. I was a single mother, there was no possible way I was going to take pain medicine, and I never did.
I read all the information on anti-inflammatories and what they do you to your body after prolonged use. After I realized what they do to you, I quit taking those as well. I had no idea what I was going to do except learn to deal with the pain.
It was about this time I had a flare that had lasted about six months. I went to my doctor’s looking for answers.
You know those people who want to understand why things are the way they are? That’s me. I don’t believe something because someone says that’s the way it is. I told her that I was no longer taking any medication and I didn’t want anything that was going to mask my disease and cause other diseases. What she knew about this disease was all I wanted to know.
It was the first time I felt like she was truthful with me. She explained that I had Lupus, and I’d probably die with it or from it. There was no scientific reason at this time as to what caused Lupus. She believed that stress was triggering my flares, but there was no proof. She told me if I didn’t start taking better care of myself, I wouldn’t live to see fifty. I was trying to do too much for someone who has this disease.
Stress? I didn’t feel stressed, but looking back now, I realize I was. From that moment on, I made the decision that I was going to do whatever necessary to take care of myself holistically. I read any book I could on Lupus, health, and nutrition. During this time was when I read my first book on Mindfulness. I had already dived a little into meditation but wanted to learn more. I changed the way I ate, thought, and lived.
This is my journey of what I did to feel my best with my chronic illness. It is not intended to provide any medical advice or to ignore what your doctors tell you. You should do what you think is best for you. I’ve learned that each person is different; what works for one of us may not work for everyone.
If you would like to continue learning about my journey with Lupus, please read: How I Transformed My Health, My Five Healthy Tips
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